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Special force to pursue missing engines

KUALA LUMPUR, DECEMBER 26 – Despite the removal of two jet engines from Malaysian soil, a team of determined Malaysians comprising of various governmental departments has decided that it will stop at nothing to bring the missing equipment back.

Termed as Operasi Tangkap Enjin (OTE), the task force will be deployed to Argentina and will feature a total of 30 operatives from the Royal Malaysian Police (RMP), the Ministry of Home Affairs and the Ministry of Foreign Affairs.

The formation of the special task force was announced to the public at a ceremony outside the Kuala Lumpur Convention Centre (KLCC) earlier today, and was officiated by the Minister of Home Affairs, Dato’ Seri Hishammudin Tun Hussein. Taking place over the course of two hours, the event involved a series of traditional dances and performances by local artistes, as well as the members of the OTE team posing for the media.

“After we found out that the engines were taken to Argentina, we came up with the most logical solution available to us at the moment, which was to take them back,” said Malaysia’s police chief, Tan Sri Musa Hassan in a press conference after the ceremony today. “We are confident that our actions will strike terror in the hearts of the Argentinian engine-nabbers!”

South American itinerary

After arriving in Buenos Aires, the OTE task force will set up a base of operations in one of the hotels within the city. To assist in the operations, a Nuri helicopter supplied by the Royal Malaysian Air Force (RMAF) will be supplied to the team in parts and will be assembled by the OTE personnel as soon as they land on the South American continent. The team will also include three dog handlers and their search-and-rescue German Shepherds specifically trained to sniff out the errant jet engines.

“I am very happy to be a part of this task force. We will stay in Argentina until we find the engines,” said Lieutenant Rafiz Hanirozlin, the representative from the RMP who will be heading the OTE task force. Clad in a bright yellow uniforms, the members of the team will be required to bring a Jalur Gemilang flag each to clearly display Malaysian representation in its foreign affairs.

According to Hishammuddin, a government-sponsored blogger will be made part of the team to ensure the smooth flow of communication between the task force and the Malaysian government. “The events will also be made public to show the progress of the OTE personnel,” said the Minister of Home Affairs. “We will also develop a page on the 1Malaysia website and inspire the rakyat to vote for their favourite OTE member over the Internet.”

In response to a question regarding the engines being sold as opposed to being taken, the IGP replied, “I don’t see any receipt involving the sale of these engines. To date, we have received no information on the matter, and if the affected parties cannot come up with an invoice detailing the sale of these engines, then we have to classify this case under theft.”

Hishammudin further mentioned that the OTE expedition will commence as soon as Air Asia forms a travel route to Argentina.

Filed under: Malaysia, Satire by Cadraver Tagged with: air asia • argentina • buenos aires • f5e engine • foreign affairs • hishammuddin • home affairs • jet engine • musa hassan • ote • police • rmp • tangkap enjin

One Response to “Special force to pursue missing engines”

  1. Nikolai Alexovitch Shitov Says:
    December 28th, 2009 at 1:14 am

    Reminds me of the Keystone Cops of Charlie Chaplin era silent comedy.

    Bet you they won’t find those engines in that un-named company in Argentina.

    End of story will be case closed without anyone prosecuted.

    MALAYSIA BOLEH!

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